Answers to Forgotten Prayers
I stumbled across a folder entitled “Prayer” on my computer today. I didn’t remember creating it, and I don’t remember the few moments spent writing the solitary document that made up the folder’s entire contents. I am no great penner of prayers like those faithful men whose words appear in the Valley of Vision. But it is an encouragement to see answers in the present to forgotten prayers in the past. That God answers even the prayers I forget makes me come before him more.
I cannot begin but by thanking you, and not for the circumstances you have brought to pass alone, but for your person and work that stands far above every wave of shifting happiness or sorrow. The strength and value of a rock, a refuge, a bulwark is measured by the forces it can repel without suffering harm. You are the bulwark never failing, the refuge unbreakable, the rock immovable. Beyond this you are my bulwark, my rock, my refuge. You who by all rights ought to be my enemy for good and just cause have not laid down your arms but struck another and considered the strike against me. Mercy in the highest degree you have shown: mercy to ransom, mercy to justify, mercy to qualify to stand before you as a son, prodigal though I am.
As I look inward, Lord, I see insufficiency and weakness, timidity and smallness of soul. And yet I also see courage and strength, qualification to be used and faith. These are of your doing, grown in me through the regenerating and sanctifying work of the Spirit of Christ. Father, thank you for growing in me a tenderness of conscience to see sin. Thank you for the courage to pursue —— ——— to ask forgiveness even when he did not perceive offense, though I knew the motives of my heart were impure and my words matched the suit of their origin. Even as I feel the tentacles of smug satisfaction over the fact that I would recognize and repent of sin which so many others would brush off encircle my heart I pray you would protect me. Please do not allow the good you are growing in me grow what is evil, a pride that would undo me. And not because it would undo me in the eyes of others, though that would grieve me for bringing disrepute upon the gospel. I pray you would keep me from sin because it is against your face. Against you and you only have I sinned. Restrain me as you restrained Abimelech before Sarah, not to allow sin.
In the name of your Son, Jesus Christ,